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39 | The Surprising Mind: How should you relate to your emotions?


What a great question! How should you relate to your emotions, indeed? We paint a picture for you in this episode, which wraps up our Surprising Mind season. We also share 10 common, erroneous myths about emotions and talk about how we have synergy or overlap with certain healing ministries. 

Painting A Picture for relating to your emotions

Think of a Catholic man or woman in midlife, which you probably are. And, in this person’s life, her dad passed away several years ago. She’s had some time to grieve and heal. 

And today there’s something coming up like a birthday or an anniversary. She’s sad because her dad’s not there to celebrate with her. She is sad. 

That’s a present moment, an emotional experience, and of course, she might be sad and might weep or be downcast for a time. She might think about her dad and process through the experience of the emotion.

That’s an example of a healthy way for your emotions to show up. 

Now, let’s go further and say that she has baggage that she hasn’t released, like an emotional block or some kind of limiting belief. As she thinks about missing her dad, a bunch of other thoughts and emotions also arise: “my dad wasn’t there for me, he wasn’t a very good dad. I have a lot of hurts. I feel abandoned.” And all that stuff comes up when she is experiencing the sadness. 

That’s the past coming to invade your present emotional experience. That’s baggage.

If and when she releases and lets go of all that baggage, then she can enter into the present moment, an emotional experience that’s natural, healthy, and without added stress and darkness. 

That’s the kind of experience that also creates false beliefs like, “nobody’s gonna be there to help me. I’ve gotta do it all on my own, all the time.” 

In terms of the relationship, she might just think,” Yeah, I’ve got baggage, and I always will. That’s just how it is.” 

You can do the work to get rid of your baggage. So you can feel better about life. So you don’t walk around unloading it on others, or letting it come out sideways. So your spiritual life can take deeper root in the other areas of your life. So you can have interior peace and freedom. 

Ten Untrue Myths About Emotions

  1. Working with the emotions means suppressing them. 
  2. Having strong feelings means I’m out of control.
  3. It’s wrong or inauthentic to shift my emotions.
  4. My emotions speak the absolute truth.
  5. Some emotions are stupid.
  6. Emotions happen for no reason.
  7. It’s better to be rational than emotional. 
  8. I am my emotions. 
  9. I should put on a mask and not show others how I feel. 
  10. If I feel like doing something, then that must be the right decision for me. 
  11. I should feel like everyone else is feeling. 

We had a lot of fun talking about these myths. Karen found a buzzer. Kind of a weak goose buzzer, but she had fun giving them the buzzer. 

There are 10 myths plus a bonus myth. Ha! 

Which of these myths do you find yourself buying into from time to time?

“Pray, hope, and don’t worry. Worry is useless. God is merciful and will hear your prayer.”

Padre Pio

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